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Awake & Alive

5 Ways to be a Better Husband

Society jeers that the average husband is a goof that can’t get it right no matter how hard he tries, often portraying him as the Homer Simpson or Peter Griffin type.  Is this accurate? Hell no! But it is good to get a reminder now and then to help us be a better husband, so she won’t think you grew into a heartless buffoon.

Marriage isn’t easy. Being a better husband takes work.

Sometimes husbands get a bad rap, often we are seen as Homer Simpson or Peter Griffin. Society jeers that the average husband is a goof that can’t get it right no matter how hard he tries. All parody aside I believe that most husbands want to do their best and desire to be the best they can for their wives. However, even the best of intentions can be lost in the daily skirmish of life.

Every now and then we just need a little reminder, a simple nudge to get us back to being the guy she married. Perhaps, any or all of these five ways to be a better husband will score you major points in the husband department and help your wife fall in love all over again!



#1: Be a Better Husband and Do Something SHE Wants to Do (That You Wouldn’t)

It is the second weekend in October and College Football is in full swing; you set your mind to watching the games all day and then your wife asks you to go to a craft fair with her. Now, the very idea of going to a craft fair may make your skin crawl, but she just wants you to spend time with her doing an activity she enjoys. She isn’t really asking you so that you will take up crafting (although showing an interest in her hobbies does make her feel special), she simply wants company.

It isn’t very much to go with her just for the day. Chances are your wife isn’t going to ask you to do something all the time that you would otherwise never do, so DO IT. Sharing activities that you wouldn’t normally do with your wife is a great way to let her know you care. Also it shows you aren’t becoming a grump set in your ways. Remember when you dated? I bet you did all kinds of things that you would have otherwise had no interest in whatsoever in order to get the girl. Guess what? She is still that girl; go get her!

#2: Be a Better Husband by Listening

Predictable, right? An article about being a better husband includes listening as one of the tips. Well, it is true. Women are much more verbal than men. They like to talk about things in much greater detail than a guy normally would. Your wife could just want to tell you about her day, or the kids, or a story about a friend. She might have a problem she is expressing to you. Chances are she just wants you to listen and not fix it (at least not in the moment).

The real key to listening is being present. Be attentive and really dial in on what she is saying. Also recall is important; being able to recall past conversations and details she mentioned shows that you were listening. Paying attention makes her feel special and loved. Engage in the art of conversation with your wife, talk about issues, dreams, interests, life. When you were dating you probably chatted for hours, bring that back! Talk and LISTEN to you wife.

#3: Do WHATEVER It Takes

All husbands should have this drive in them that no matter what life throws at them they will do whatever it takes to provide and care for his family. This means if you lose your job, you will get work no matter what it is. If you were the CEO of a major company and all of the sudden you didn’t have a job you would be willing to pick up a shovel and dig a ditch if it meant you could buy groceries for your family.

“Even when life gets to be the most difficult and the struggles are heavy and real; I will put my wife and family first and make sure that I am doing absolutely EVERYTHING in my power to meet their needs.”

Being a better husband is and always has been about putting your wife’s needs before your own. Show her you are a man than will fight for his family!

#4: Woo Her

Every now and then you need to lay that heavy woo. I am talking about sending the kids over to Grandma’s for the night, pouring some choice wine, putting on some Coltrane and cooking a five star meal that will knock her off her feet; that is the kind of woo I am talking about.

Being romantic is an everyday necessity in a marriage comprised of lots of sweet little gestures. That is not what I am referring to here. I want you to go BIG! I want you to think out of the box and plan an all out evening that will impress her, captivate her, steal her heart, make her smile, a night she will remember always. Take charge and plan the whole thing, every detail.

This isn’t date night. If you are being a good husband already then you have a date night fairly regularly. This is about being better than good. Every once in a while you need to go for the extravagant, the elegant, the fantasy-turned-real life! Woo her! Show her a grand gesture of your love. I bet you pulled out all the stops when you were trying to win her heart and hand during courtship; don’t let that fade!

“Ignite passion not with a spark but with a whole damn can of gasoline and a rocket launcher!”

#5: Be a Better Husband and Follow Through

I speak about this one all of the time and I assure you nothing will make you a better husband than this. When you can establish an unwavering level of dependability with your wife and she sees that you treat others the same way, always there for someone when you said you were going to be there, then there is a level of trust and security that is super strong. Trust and security are two attributes women look for when choosing a mate. Follow through delivers both.

You wife needs to know she can count on you. Now it might be easier to apply this concept to your wife, I get it she’s your wife you are going to try a little harder. The real trick is applying this concept to everyone. That is when your wife will really see what a high caliber man you are. Follow through; do what you said you were going to do, when you said you were going to do it, how you said you were going to do it.

“Follow through means this; you do what you said you were going to do, when you said you were going to do it, how you said you were going to do it. Simple. “

I believe in marriage. It is my hope that every marriage lasts and that the couple shares the ups and downs, the hard times and wonderful times, the pains and pleasures, the losses and gains. Embrace the journey that marriage is and do your part to be the BEST husband you can be. Don’t get complacent and don’t get boring. Use these five suggestions to help you grow and rise to greatness in your marriage.

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Mark Smith

Mark Smith

Mark Smith is the owner of Asylum Fitness in beautiful Wilmington, North Carolina. He is a Movement and Strength Coach that uses unconventional tools and methods to make his students a little better with each practice. His main focus is movement, he believes, “We were born to move. Reclaim your birthright.” He encourages his students and all those he meets to just play, similarly to when you were a kid, believing that play is the foundation of movement and movement is life. “By learning to move better and improving our mobility, everything falls into place.” he says. Mark is an Outdoor Fitness Enthusiast, is well versed in corrective exercises, and currently holds a level 1 FMS (Functional Movement Screen), and is a MovNat level 2 certified trainer and is always seeking to learn from the best. He also has a background in track and field, martial arts, ballroom dance, and currently is practicing parkour.

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